Last night I watched a shoe on a local channel, a boy %26amp; a girl (both in their early 20%26#039;s) were talking about such issues as at what age to have sex, or protection, or Baby Mommas, about commitment or being %26quot;stuck%26quot;. Anyway, the girl was just amazing, her opinion was exactly how I felt %26amp; overall she came across as a young woman that knows herself %26amp; that made her very attractive to me (in a non sexual way) I was just like wow she is so awsome! So she talked about her first time %26amp; how she was 18 %26amp; she talked to her Mom about it %26amp; so on %26amp; I started thinking about my train wreck childhood, abut my past, about all the mistakes I made %26amp; how they have contributed to my current state of mind %26amp; life. I was sad because I wish I had a glow like that, I wish I didnt have all this baggage %26amp; this sad traumatic past, I wish I could talk about good things instead of all these sad things I have been through. So do you know how you can become a better person %26amp; build a positive image of an intriguing woman
How do I let go of my past? How can I %26quot;fix%26quot; my attitude %26amp; personality?
You are already on your way. I am a mature fellow, wife, children %26amp; grand children, and I seem to be always on the lookout to %26quot;refine%26quot; myself. (that aging with grace thing). It is a minute by minute, day by day process. It is also a situational process. In other words if you find yourself involved in a challenging social situation and it is one that you have experienced before, you may have not liked your %26quot;reaction%26quot; or %26quot;feelings%26quot; you had the last time. It may be an excellent opportunity to %26quot;redefine yourself%26quot;. Life is filled with those opportunities and that is when you present the %26quot;YOU%26quot; that you wish others to see. Of course, don%26#039;t be surprised if someone else doesn%26#039;t see the you that you are trying to project, (unpredictable human nature), just be patient. As far as your past is concerned, try not to be an %26quot;open book%26quot;. It will always be with you, but, you should control it and not the other way around. I wish I could have been better as a child, but, I wasn%26#039;t. Nobody cares, so I am polite, and as nice as possible without being neurotic. (I hope) I like being like that, my family likes me that way,and they enjoy my company. Actually they think it%26#039;s funny the way I try not being angry. You should read about other peoples lives and it may give you a better understanding of who and why we are in this %26quot;culture%26quot; (there are so many factors). I have a friend who had a %26quot;sad%26quot; childhood. Ignored by his parents, had to be taken in by neighbors on a day by day basis. He mentions it sometimes, but, mostly he talks about how happy he is and how great things are going now that he is close to retirement, ( I really just want to tell him to shut the **** up ), but, he is my freind so I just tell him I%26#039;m happy for him. Bottom line, nobody is perfect. If you want to strive for it that is good, just be realistic if you fall short from time to time,and don%26#039;t be hard on yourself. You can be who ever you choose to be. Just remember, nobody likes a Whiner. Dont%26#039; forget the body language! Good luck!
Reply:You let go of your past by concentrating on the present...and on the many positive things that might be happening in your life. On the many positive values and attitudes you have.
By doing something you love doing. By helping others - only then you might realize just how lucky you are. You are aware of how your past has shaped you, and your present position...but use it to your advantage!
And as far as the show is concerned - they took the girl precisely because of how she appeals to the audience. They even guided her in answering the questions, under the right lighting, with the right make -up.
Even if her life might of been %26quot;easier%26quot; than yours she might be a wreck now. Good memories unfortunately don%26#039;t guarantee a good future.
Reply:To let go of your past: Get a pad of paper and start writing. Acknowledge what happened and how you feel. Give yourself time to processes the facts and the feelings. Accept yourself and your feelings. Then say, OK, it happened. Let%26#039;s move on. Forgive yourself and be gentle with yourself; then make some new choices. Forgiveness means you don%26#039;t bring it up anymore. Once you pour it out on paper, cry about it, acknowledge it, let it go. you can%26#039;t change the past, only your perception of it. Once you acknowledge and feel your own feelings, you will feel like you%26#039;ve lost all your baggage. You just need to take all the time you need to go through this process. When you are done, you will have that glow. I promise.
Reply:First you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and look for ways to overcome your %26quot;poor pitiful me%26quot; attitude. I know very few people that have had a perfect childhood yet they are well balanced and happy. We%26#039;ve all made mistakes so take responsibility for yours and learn from them. Stop placing the blame on anyone but yourself.
Reply:jsut remember this that afetr every dark night there is a shiny clean day.
the same was with me.but i forget my past and i started living with positve attitudes.
remember the winner always has hurddles.
the looser have no hurddle so he loose
so dont be dissapoint
we accpet limited dissapointment but we should not loose unlimited hopes.be brave
wat so every gone means gone
buck up n start thinking of new life
aamir
aamirtaj@yahoo.com
flower
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